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Relation to oneself· Adversity

What is up to us

Axis: Scope of actionFacing the world, should we focus on what is up to us or strive to extend our mastery?

Some things are up to us, our judgments and our will; others are not, such as health, reputation, or external events. Wisdom consists in focusing our efforts on the former and accepting the latter with equanimity.

Who holds this position

Movements 3

Cynicismexplicit

One is free only in proportion to what one can do without: every need is a hold that the world, fortune or the powerful have on us. From this the Cynic draws (self-sufficiency) as the goal, living so that nothing external is necessary and no one therefore holds anything we depend on. When Alexander, master of the known world, offered to grant him any wish, Diogenes asked only that he stand out of his sunlight: this shows that the most destitute of men, if he desires nothing, is more invulnerable than the mightiest of kings, who remains at the mercy of what he owns.

Diogenes Laertius, Lives, VI, 38

Stoicismexplicit

The is the founding act: only our judgments, desires and impulses are truly up to us, not the body, reputation or fortune. The argument is practical: tying one's good to what is not up to us dooms one to disturbance, whereas concentrating effort on the one masterable domain makes serenity invulnerable to circumstance, even in exile or prison.

Epictetus, Enchiridion, §1 · Epictetus, Discourses

Taoismexplicit

The world already follows its own : to set it right by will, by law or by calculated effort is to break that order and produce the opposite of what one intends, as one kills a plant by pulling at its shoots. From this observation Taoism draws : not inertia, but an efficacy through espousal rather than constraint, like water that, being the most yielding, wears down the hard by giving way to it. Where would reform man through moral effort and ritual, the Taoist holds that all willful action deepens the very disorder it means to mend: it is the exact reverse of a drive to mastery.

Laozi, Dao De Jing (Tao Te Ching), ch. 43, 78 · Zhuangzi, ch. 6 (The Great and Venerable Teacher)

Philosophers 8

Diogenes of Sinopeexplicit

One is free only in proportion to what one can do without: every need is a hold that the world, fortune or the powerful have on us. Hence (self-sufficiency) as the goal, living so that nothing external is necessary and no one therefore holds anything we depend on. When Alexander, master of the known world, offered to grant him any wish, Diogenes asked only that he stand out of his sunlight: the most destitute of men, if he desires nothing, is more invulnerable than the mightiest of kings, who remains at the mercy of what he owns. The Stoics would later take up this operation as the of control, but Diogenes carries it out through deeds and destitution rather than inner judgment, without turning it into a settled thesis.

Diogenes Laertius, Lives, VI, 38

Epictetusexplicit

The root of all unhappiness, Epictetus argues, is to expect one's happiness from things that are not in our power. Hence the opening move of the : sorting our concerns into two classes by the single criterion of mastery, what is wholly up to us (judgments, desires, aversions) and what is not (body, goods, reputation). The is not one thesis among others but the operation that conditions everything that follows: all disturbance arises from having claimed a hold on what eludes us. Where the older Stoics dwelt on cosmic fate, Epictetus brings the division down to the concrete use, here and now, of what is properly mine.

Enchiridion, §1 · Discourses, I.1

Marcus Aureliusexplicit

Taking up the of , Marcus continually brings his mind back to the one masterable domain: external things do not touch the soul, which is disturbed only by the judgment it adds to them; remove that judgment, drop the « I am harmed », and the harm itself is gone.

Meditations, V, 19 · Meditations, VI, 52 · Meditations, VIII, 47

Senecaexplicit

Misfortune comes not from things but from our grip on them: only what we wrongly count as ours can be torn away. From this Seneca draws the : to count as one's own only one's judgements and desires, surrendering fortune to the chance that gives and reclaims it. Less a speculative thesis than a practical directive, it makes invulnerable by shrinking the surface he offers to blows: what he carries within, no fortune can reach.

Letters to Lucilius, IX (the wise man is self-sufficient) · On the Constancy of the Wise Man, V-VI

Laoziexplicit

Against the voluntarism that would bend the course of things to a design, Laozi observes that forced intervention turns against itself: the more one grasps, the more one loses; the more laws are made, the more thieves arise. is not passivity but the art of espousing the of things, like water that flows around the obstacle without fighting it: act without forcing, and everything is accomplished. It is the exact reverse of the Prometheanism that measures the human by their grip on the world.

Dao De Jing, ch. 37 and 48 · Dao De Jing, ch. 57 and 64

Zhuangziexplicit

Cook Ding carves an ox without ever dulling his blade: he does not cut, he follows the openings the carcass offers, and the knife moves through the void. The parable gives its most concrete sense: not inaction, but action so wedded to the real that it ceases to be effort. Against the voluntarism that bends things to a design, efficacy comes to one who imposes nothing and slips where the situation yields, like the swimmer of the falls who "goes in with the swirl and comes out with the eddy." Where draws non-action toward the art of governing, Zhuangzi unfolds it as a lived, almost bodily mastery of the right gesture.

Zhuangzi, ch. 3 (Cook Ding) · Zhuangzi, ch. 19 (the swimmer of the falls)

Show inferred positions (2)
The Buddhainferable

A decisive part of suffering springs from our claim to master what eludes us: one cannot command the aggregates "let them be thus and not otherwise", and trying to hold the impermanent only feeds . Wisdom consists in loosening that grip and working the one domain genuinely open to effort, one's own mind, which brings Gautama close to an economy of control centered on inwardness.

Anattalakkhaṇa Sutta, Saṃyutta Nikāya 22.59 (one cannot command the aggregates) · Dhammapada, ch. III (The Mind)

Socratesinferable

Before his judges, Socrates declares himself serene: they may kill or banish him, they cannot harm him, for the only real evil is to make one's soul bad, and no one can do that in one's stead. External goods, the body, reputation, life itself, are not in our power and are not the true good; the soul's virtue, by contrast, depends on us. The Stoics would build their on this intuition.

Plato, Apology, 30c-d (they can kill me but not harm me) · Plato, Apology, 41c-d

Arguments and objections
ArgumentThe inner citadelTo hang your peace on what does not depend on you is to leave it to chance; to rest it on what does depend on you is to put it out of harm's reach.
  1. Of all that happens to us, one part alone is truly in our power: not events, nor the body, nor the opinion of others, but the use we make of our impressions, our .
  2. To pin your happiness on what does not depend on you is to entrust it to what can be taken away: fortune gives and takes back health, possessions, the people we love. Whoever hangs his peace on these lives hanging on what he does not control.
  3. To turn your effort instead toward what depends on you is to build a freedom nothing external can touch: I can be chained, ruined, banished, but no one can make me judge that an evil reaches me if I do not consent to it.

Therefore So to focus your life on what depends on you is not to resign yourself, it is to win the one mastery that hangs on no circumstance.

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ObjectionThe charge of resignationBy filing the world under the inevitable, the dichotomy of control risks counseling passivity before ills that effort could correct.
  1. The places our judgments on one side and almost everything else on the other: illness, poverty, injustice, the social order. All of that, it invites us to take in without letting it disturb our peace.
  2. Yet many of these so-called inevitabilities are nothing of the sort: illness recedes before medicine, destitution before action, injustice before those who fight it. To deem them beyond our power in advance is sometimes to be mistaken about that power.
  3. The risk is then moral as much as practical: a wisdom that soothes by turning its gaze from what could be corrected looks like a consolation for those who give up. put it in a single stroke: philosophers have only interpreted the world; the point is to change it.

Therefore So the dichotomy of control, by drawing the line of the inevitable too soon, risks christening as wisdom what is only resignation.

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ObjectionThe fox's freedomThe sage's serenity might be only a disguised renunciation: we stop wanting what we cannot reach, then call it freedom.
  1. The sage says he no longer desires anything he does not control. But how did he learn to stop wanting it? Often by persuading himself that it was not worth wanting.
  2. It is the gesture of the fox in the fable, who declares the grapes too sour because he cannot reach them. saw in it the mainspring of a morality of resignation: lacking power, one makes a virtue of one's powerlessness.
  3. If my serenity requires desiring only what I am sure to obtain, it grows only as what I care about shrinks. It is a real peace, but paid for by an impoverishment of life.

Therefore So the sage's freedom might be no conquest, but a renunciation in disguise: the calm of one who has ceased to want, for want of power.

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Practices
Daily dichotomy of control journalingExerciseAttested · Epictetus

opened his handbook with one simple rule: some things are up to us, others are not. This journal applies that to your concrete worries, so you stop draining yourself on the uncontrollable. Today it is a quick tool against diffuse anxiety and a sense of helplessness.

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Imitating the prudentRuleInspired by Aristotle

What would the prudent person do here? Imitate their discernment until it becomes your own.

For , telling things apart is taught by no rule: perceives what is right in the singular case, and you first learn it by watching those who have it. Right action, he says, is what « the prudent person » would decide. This rule gives you a living compass rather than a recipe: when no method settles the matter, take your bearings from the discernment of those you admire, until in time you come to judge as they do.

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Premeditatio malorum: the premeditation of adversityExerciseAttested · Stoicism

Practiced by , this exercise consists in calmly picturing, in advance, the setbacks a day or a project might bring. Far from pessimism, it defuses anxiety and trains you to separate what is up to you from what is not. Today it helps you face an interview, a trip, or a hard decision without being paralyzed by the unexpected.

  1. Pick an upcoming situation that worries you (a meeting, a deadline, a conversation).
  2. List in writing the plausible mishaps: delay, refusal, breakdown, criticism, the other person's silence.
  3. For each one, ask: is this up to me? Note the part that lies in your choices and the part that does not.
  4. Prepare a concrete response for the part that is up to you, and formulate a sentence of acceptance for the rest.
  5. Close the exercise: you have rehearsed the ordeal and can now act with a lighter mind.

as needed, the evening before an important event, 10 minutes · Attested · Stoicism

The aim is to prepare, not to ruminate. If the exercise feeds anxiety rather than easing it, cut it short and focus only on the responses you can prepare.

Sorting the possible from the inevitableRuleInspired by the Serenity Prayer (Reinhold Niebuhr)

The serenity to accept what cannot be changed, the courage to change what can be, and the wisdom to tell the difference.

A famous prayer, by the Protestant theologian Reinhold Niebuhr, asks for « the serenity to accept what cannot be changed, the courage to change what can be, and the wisdom to tell the difference ». Independently of its original religious setting, what we keep here is its structure of discernment, the of the ancients made method: faced with an ordeal, not to settle too quickly between accepting everything and wanting to change everything, but to look for the boundary, case by case. Today this rule helps when a difficulty seems to swamp everything and you no longer know where to act or where to let go.

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The obstacle becomes the wayStanceAttested · Marcus Aurelius

What stands in the way of action advances action; what blocks the road becomes the road.

recalled that the mind can turn into material for action what claims to thwart it: the impediment becomes the occasion to exercise patience, ingenuity or justice. To hold this stance is, before a setback you cannot undo, to stop fretting against it and see in it the task of the moment, acting on the part that is up to you. Not to skirt the obstacle by denial, but to make it the very ground of virtue.

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Throwing away the cupExerciseAttested · Diogenes

Before acquiring, ask whether a child already does without it.

Seeing a child drink from his cupped hands, threw away his cup, the last thing he owned: a child had just outdone him in simplicity. The exercise is to spot, now and then, a possession or convenience you assume you need, and to do without it for a while in order to discover how little is truly necessary. It is training in , which loosens our dependence on things and leaves us freer.

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The view from aboveExerciseAttested · Stoicism, Marcus Aurelius

Marcus Aurelius trained himself to contemplate his life and troubles as if seeing them from high in the sky, at the scale of the whole of nature. This widening of view restores worries to their true size and tempers both pride and despair. Today it offers a moment of distance from a conflict or annoyance that seems to fill everything.

  1. Sit quietly and close your eyes. Breathe slowly a few times.
  2. Imagine rising above the room, then the city, then the Earth seen from space.
  3. From that height, observe the multitude of human lives, past and future generations, the vastness of time.
  4. Place your current worry within this picture: what room does it really take up?
  5. Descend gently and return to your task, keeping this regained sense of proportion.

when a worry takes over, 5 minutes · Attested · Stoicism, Marcus Aurelius

Putting things in perspective is not denial. This exercise eases disproportionate worries but should not be used to minimize real suffering or an injustice that calls for action.

Wu-wei: the art of non-forcingStanceAttested · Laozi

Do not add your strength against the current: move with it.

, the non-action of , is not inaction but the art of acting without forcing, sensing the current already present in a situation so as to move with it rather than struggle against it. It means giving up the wish to master what is not yours to control, and trusting the natural bent of things, their . Today this disposition eases the exhaustion of those who try to control everything: you stop pushing a door that opens the other way, and you often find the right move, the one that asks the least effort.

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Problems
  • Descriptive
    Truly masters of our own judgments?

    Stoicism places our judgments on the side of what is up to us, but do we truly choose them, or are our opinions, emotions and desires dictated to us by the body, our history and the causes that make us? If even the inner world escapes us, does the dichotomy still hold?

    our judgments
  • PrescriptiveMoral Situation
    Accept, or resign oneself?

    Where is the line between serenity before the inevitable and passivity, even a convenient excuse, before a wrong that effort could put right?

    a wrong suffered
  • Descriptive
    My power, or our power?

    What is not up to me alone, illness, injustice, the course of the world, may be up to us together: by seeking power in the inner self alone, does the dichotomy ignore the collective action that shifts the limits of the possible?

    collective power